Baños

Baños is THE place in South America to do extreme sports. We had saved a lot of money in the past few days by scrimping and saving so we were fully prepared to have a go at everything. We had such a good time in Pucon and expected Baños to be the same.

On the way to Baños we were looking for somewhere to stop for lunch and we spotted another Dragoman truck going the other way. We stopped and chatted and looked curiously at how the others lived (they had overhead lockers on their truck! crazy!) and shared stories (have the wheels come off your truck yet? etc). There were some kids with some pigs nearby and we needed to get rid of the excess food off the truck, so we had a good time finding out the pigs favourite food (bananas and tomatoes are popular - not too keen on lettuce or red cabbage) and gave the kids a couple of sandwiches, which they took suspiciously.

The campsite was just outside Baños in a place called Rio Verde (translated as green river) in the rain forest. The owner was a Scottish guy who used to be a Dragoman driver himself and he welcomed us with a huge BBQ. He organises the trips in the area and gave us a talk on what was possible and showed us a DVD. There were a few good walks in the area with big waterfalls, but we were only interested in 1 thing - EXTREME SPORTS. The options were canyoning, bridge swinging and rafting. We signed up for all 3: Canyoning the next morning, followed by bridge swinging and then rafting the next day.

Dee and I ate the BBQ and had a couple of glasses of wine to celebrate our 4th anniversary (aahhhh) and got an early night so we wouldnt be tired the next day for canyoning. Canyoning is hiking through a canyon, or river, and involves abseiling, flying foxes and cliff jumping. We put on our wetsuits and helmets and converse trainers and headed for the canyon. The trip started with a quick dunk into the freezing cold canyon water and then we jumped backwards off a small waterfall. After a short abseil down some slippery rocks, we attached ourselves to the flying fox (a zip line) and zipped down the next waterfall. The water was cold but this was great fun. We had been told there was a small possibility that we would get the chance to do a 7m cliff jump down a waterfall if the conditions were right. They obviously werent, because we ended up abseiling down the waterfall, which was scary enough as it was. We finished the day by floating down a waterfall head first and then practiced somersaults into a natural pool. In total we were in the canyon for about 4 hours and Dee must have liked it because she hardly moaned about the cold at all. Unfortunately my waterproof camera was crap and the photos didnt come out very well.

If that wasnt enough excitement for one day, we went back to the camp for soup and then headed straight back out to do the bridge swing. Bridge swinging is like bungee jumping except the rope isnt elastic (gulp!) and it is tied to the opposite side of the bridge so that you swing under the bridge as you fall. Dee wanted to go first for some bizarre reason, but when she looked over the edge, she decided to let Gaz go first to see if he survives. Gaz wanted to do it in his pants (dont ask) and when he jumped, the look on Dees face was not one of confidence. Actually it was one of pooing herself. As she was being strapped in she was visibly shaking with nerves. I bid her one last goodbye and went down to the river to take photos for insurance purposes. Everyone helped by counting down and she jumped silently into the canyon. Dee is scared of heights so I give her full respect for jumping. When she swung back from under the bridge we heard her cry "ITS HOOORRIBLE!", but when she returned she was smiling (and still shaking), so it cant have been that bad.

A few others jumped off and then it was my turn. The realisation that there is no going back once you step off the bridge is the worst feeling. The fact that the bridge is not that high and you can see the small stream and rocks below, only makes the experience seem more real and dangerous. The guide held the harness and asked me to take my hands off the bridge and lean forwards over the 30m drop below; "WHAT?". This involves trusting the total stranger behind me to take my weight and not drop me. Once this happens you are not in control and then the adrenaline really starts pumping. People count down and theres no choice but to jump. The time goes so quickly when you fall that once you swing to the other side, you can hardly even remember jumping. You are supposed to jump outwards to avoid the crunch when the rope takes your weight but I had other, more pressing, things on my mind when I jumped and forgot to do this. I just fell off the bridge. Straight down. The rope smacked me in the face and the harness hitched up to crush my family jewels. After the first swing, the next few minutes were like torture. It felt like i was being suspended by my private parts. I screamed to the safety guy under the bridge that I was in pain and he laughed and nodded his head enthusiastically. Good job he didnt understand the abuse he received from me as I struggled to pull my weight off the harness and not lose consciousness. There was no escaping the crushing of the harness other than undoing it and falling onto the rocks below, and that was quickly becoming a viable option. The next few minutes felt like hours as the swinging slowed down and I was lowered into the hands of the idiot under the bridge. He still smiled out of his stupid face as I rocked in the foetal position obviously in pain. Fortunately, after a quick check, everything was still there and there was no blood. I managed to get my breath and hobble back up the rocky path to the rest of the group, just as Gaz had decided to do another jump, this time completely naked.

For some reason, when Gaz removed all his clothes, all the girls of the group (including Dee) had moved up to the bridge to get a good view. He jumped off backwards to cover his shame, but his hands didnt stay there for long. I had to delete a lot of photos from that jump for the sake of decency.

We went for a group meal that night to celebrate the jump. The owner of the campsite called us a taxi which actually turned out to be a large van used for transporting cattle. We sat on wobbly wooden stools in the complete darkness for the ride into town. We made sheep and cow noises to keep ourselves amused.

The next day was another early start for rafting. We had been told that this is proper grade 4/5 rafting, not like we had done before in Pucon. The safety talk at the beginning mentioned "holes", which are areas of the rapids that spin round like washing machines and make it hard to swim out of. Dee suddenly looked worried. We were never warned of this last time.

We started off quite slow but the river quickly became pretty fast. The rapids we had rafted on previously had lots of slow bits in between, which gave us time to recover. This whole river was 1 BIG rapid. There was only 4 people in our raft and our guide didnt seem to be very good at steering. After about 10 minutes we hit a huge wave and me and Dee were thrown far from the raft. Last time we did rafting, if we came off the boat, it was only a few seconds until the rapid had finished where the water slowed so we could be saved. This time we were dragged down the river for ages, through huge waves and currents. I was having fun navigating the rapids myself through the big waves, despite being dragged under occasionally. I was eventually saved by a worryingly concerned-looking safety kayaker. Dee was saved by the people in the other raft and when we re-joined, Dee had a very panicked look on her face. She didnt enjoy being dragged under the water at all, especially after being told about the dreaded "holes". She was quiet and pasty-faced as we navigated the rapids down to the cliff jump point, no laughing like last time. We got out the boat to do the jump but Dee was still shaken up, so she didnt jump off the 5m cliff into the natural pool. I jumped off twice and then we got back in the raft to the next set of rapids.

The guide told us that we werent paddling hard enough, but by arms were aching with the effort. It wasnt long before we got to a fork in the river and the other team took the harder rapids to the right of the fork, while we went left into the easier section. I was quite jealous looking over at the other group, but at the end of our easy section was a huge rock, 2 metres out of the water and after that, some tough grade 5 rapids (grade 6 is the highest). The guide stupidly steered us straight into the rock without shouting out any commands and we capsized right at the beginning of the rapids. I hit Gary in the face with my paddle and then hit the rocky river bed. I swam underwater for a bit to avoid hitting anyone else and avoid the raft above me. The bit I had swam into was behind the rock where there was a small, shallow whirlpool. I was stuck there spinning for a bit while the capsized raft bounced on down through the rapids with Gary and Vincent attached for dear life and struggling for breath. I managed to swim out of the whirlpool and immediately was dragged over 3 rocks. Luckily, I remembered the safety talk at the beginning and went down the rapids feet first, hitting my bum on the rocks as I went and avoided any cuts or bruises. I remember thinking "Ow, that was a rock... Ow, that was a rock... Ow, that was a rock" as I skimmed over them. I heard shouting from the guides further down the river and I waved to them to show that I was OK and quite enjoying the ride. They must have been looking for me because once I waved, there was a flurry of panic and pointing and the other raft paddled to try to intercept my path. They thought that they had lost me in the white water for a while. The rapids I was floating down were severe and a few times I was dragged into a hole and had to wait a few seconds holding my nose until I resurfaced. When the safety kayaker eventually got to me, I could see that he had a very concerned look on his face, as I was taken to the other raft and pulled up. The other guide was still shouting instructions to the kayaker who went off to get Dee. There was a worrying air of panic about the guides which in turn was worrying the others in the boat. This was obviously a dangerous part of the river to come off. By the time I had caught my breath I could see Dee in the water, grabbing onto the front of the safety kayak for dear life. She was so weak she could barely hold her head above the water and the waves were washing over her face relentlessly. She was gasping for breath whenever she could and crying out feebly for help. Her face was desperate and panicked as I pulled her into the raft. She sobbed limply into my lap, her muscles completely worn out. She had been pulled along with the currents, unable to get to the surface and almost passed out underwater. She had come near to drowning. She wretched a few times and coughed up water and the others in the raft steered to the bank. I tried to make a couple of jokes but Dee was not amused and she refused point blank to go any further. The guide told her that there was a meeting place she could get off just a couple of kilometres down the river, but she had already stormed into the jungle to try to escape the river. The guide told her to wait at the side of the road and he will send the truck back to get her. At the side of the road she was sick and some friendly locals offered her some oranges and looked after her till the truck arrived.

We had no choice but to continue with 3 people on 1 raft and 4 in the other. The other people in my raft had got injuries from the rocks on the river bed and had been shaken up by the crash. Gary whispered to me that he wasnt sure if he was enjoying this any more, as we paddled undermanned through ferocious rapids. In the next couple of hours we only capsized once more and this was in quite a calm bit of river, maybe grade 3, so it wasnt too bad. We were relieved to finish the ordeal and we met a dry (and happier) Dee to go for lunch at a trout farm. It will be a cold day in hell before Dee gets back on a raft, I'm sure of that.

We went into town and booked our Galapagos trip and that evening we had another BBQ and played with the owners 3 legged dog and huge insects around the campsite.

DEE SAYS:

Just in-case you didn´t quite understand the previous entry, I would like to add, on record, that this stupid activity totally sucks and I will never be happy around water again.

Imagine being in a washing machine with multiple large boulders hitting you for what seems like an eternity and there being absolutely nothing you can do about it but hope for a breath of air soon.

The first set of rapids I just seemed to tumble down on my own under the water, the next set of rapids I did clinging onto the underside of a kayak for dear life. After being pulled back into the raft, I saw the the steep jungle 6m cliff my exit and legged it. I´m all for teamwork and not letting the side down but it seems, realistically, I work on save your own ass first. I have never climbed a cliff so fast and without thought, and although puking my guts up at the side of the road isn´t my finest moment I couldn´t have cared less.

Thank you kind local lady for rubbing the gringos back and feeding her oranges to take the taste away.

I couldn´t walk or take a deep breath in the next day from the bruises and I have a bent finger FOR LIFE from where I fractured it trying to cling to the kayak. The upmost respect to the crazy idiots who think this is fun. I am a chicken s**t.