South America

In the morning (well, morningish - these beds are a luxury we cant afford to waste), we got a cab to the La Boca area of BA. Its most famous for the huge football ground which dominates the skyline, but there are also loads of arty shops which are all painted in different colours. There are people performing tango outside cool little coffee shops. It felt like Camden, but warmer and more spanishy.

By the time we had had lunch is was too late to see the famous Recoleta cemetary, so we prepared to go out for another birthday meal in Los Palmeras, which is an area in BA with lots of restaurants and bars. The vibe is very chilled out - there isnt music pumping out into the main square and no aggro - everyone sits on the roof terraces or outside the bars drinking and eating. I couldnt help thinking that the equivalent area in England would be full of shouting, fighting and loud crap funky house music. We were still very hung over from the night before at the gay club, so we played pool till 1am and left.

BA is tango city. Second night in we all went and saw a tango show in the basement of a famous tango café, Café Tortoni. Not knowing what to expect, it started setting the scene of a bar with ladies of the night and charismatic men. Dancing, singing and music followed and it was brilliant. Especially the drummers, with their dark long hair and Argentinean good looks!

Afterwards we went to another steak restaurant with live tango dancing and again the biggest pile of meat described as a portion for one I've ever seen - Ollie had meat sweats. I ate the free bread.

So time to burn off the steaks we headed for tango lessons. Ollie having done salsa thought he was a natural, all wiggly hips - shame tango is about keeping clean lines. I got made redundant as Ollie's partner, as he said I wouldn't stop leading, I think he wanted a chance to dance with all the other women (who tried to avoid Ollie in the non air con room - sweaty!). The dance teacher, a 6ft dark skinned long haired lothario, grabbed me and told me to 'dance'. I was held so strongly if I wanted to lead I had no chance, I didn't stand on his feet and felt like Mrs Tango, after he left me with a sultry 'muy bien', mmm, - ollie scowled.

However looking back at the photos I've got the grace of Charlie Chaplin in a dress - my tango dreams are crushed.

Full day on the truck today, boiling hot and everyone getting truck fever so as soon as we reached the National Park everyone jumped off the truck and straight into the Rio Uraguay. This is the natural border between Argentina and Uraguay. The river is quite silty looking but the floor sandy with little vegetation so perfect for a late afternoon dip and wash. I say river, it is huge, some people swam half the way out but undercurrents make it too dangerous to swim too far. At one point I was sitting in the shallows and something slimey wrapped round my ankle then tightened. Ollie said it was a leaf, I saw no leaves, but it looked like eel territory to me, I got out quick and started dinner as I was on cook group.

We got the fire up and started to roast off vegetable, beef and chicken skewers with freash salsa. Once the darkness came in around camp we started hearing strange screaming noises and shuffling. Having not long ago watched the film, "I am legend" my senses pricked and we started investigating. All around us were these strange little creatures, resembing a cross between a Possum and a Chinchilla, coming up to knee height. Although cute they made the strangest noise and were as blind as bats - but could smell the bread Ollie was hiding in his pocket. A few minutes later he had them eating out of his hand, it was then when we noticed their massive sharp teeth and claws. In fact Ollie was so fascinated by the creatures he forgot to take a photo of him feeding it, Ollie showing off, missing a kodak moment - this NEVER happens.

The locals called them wild rats but I have since learned that they are rodents called a plains Viscacha.

Very early start the next day but managed to glimpse the morning break, a beautiful red sunrise over Uruguay, then back onto the truck for the next adventure.

We left the Iguazu falls to travel the 442km to the Argentinian Pantanal.

On the way we stopped for lunch at a small town called San Ignacio, which used to be the site of San Ignacio Miní, an old jusuit monestary. The ruins looked like they were about a 1000 years old, but when we found out they were only 300 years old, no one was that bothered any more, so we left.

We stopped at a gas station and then took a dirt path for 2 and a half hours to get to our destination. The drivers werent sure whether the rain had made the path uncrossable, but the truck is an off-road truck anyway, so we gave it a go. The road was perillous and muddy - the truck actually slid sideways a few times, but we made it in the end, and arrived at a campsite in Carlos Pelligrini. It was the first sign of life we had come to in about 200km of dirt roads, and it was supposedly a main tourist destination for the Pantanal, but it was tiny. The roads were made from dust and there was only 1 shop. There were a couple of bars though, which are more important.

The next morning we took an early boat trip onto the Iberá Wetlands. We saw caymans (South American crocodiles), capybaras (which are like a huge guinea pig), herons, deer, a tame wildcat and loads of birds. We booked ourselves into a guided walk around an area where there are supposed to be a family of monkeys, so that made me excited.

After the boat trip we had a relaxing afternoon at the campsite, washed some clothes but didnt do the horse riding because it was too hot. The walk in the evening proved fruitful because almost straight away we spotted the family of howling monkeys. It was weird being close to them without a cage and we hung about (pun) and took loads of photos of them until they left. One of my main prorities on this trip is to see as many monkeys as possible, to the point where my nickname is now Monkey Boy (which Ive been called many times before, but mainly because of the hair on my back, not my obsession with spotting monkeys). The walk included many types of land, including savanna, marsh, jungle and lake. The guide spotted some armadillo tracks but they are shy at the time of day we were there, so we didnt see any. The guide taught us to say "¿Donde molitas?" which means "Where are the armadillos?" in Spanish, which should come in useful for armadillo spotting in the future.

We were promised a whole pig for dinner that evening. The previous night a drunk man at the bar said he would sell us his pig (dead, I presume) for only 15 pounds, but we couldnt find him, so we had to make-do with more pasta.

On the way out of the Pantanal we sat on top of the truck for the first time, which is a cool, but windy, experience.

We arrived at the campsite next to Iguazu Falls at about 6pm. The campsite is the nicest one so far. It has a pool, free internet, free table tennis, pool table and table football. After I whooped everyones arses at table football we had a bit of a swim and drank quite a lot of the 4 reais (1 pound) caipirinhas.

The next day we were up early and went to the Brazilian side of Iguazu Falls (the Brazilians spell it Iguaçu Falls). The weather was boiling and the walk we took towards the falls had amazing views. The walk went through the forest and there were loads of coatis about, which are cute but deadly, a bit like a pikey racoon. I saw them attack a woman who tried to feed them crisps. One jumped on her leg until she dropped the bag and they all came out of the trees and everyone watched and took photos of the feeding frenzy. The coatis are part of the tourist attraction almost as much as the falls.

When we got back to the campsite one of the Aussie girls had a photo of a tarantula which crawled across her foot on the walk. That totally freaked out Dee. She spent the next couple of days walking like she was barefoot on glass, just in case there is a tarantula about.

The next day we crossed the Argentinian border and went to the Argentinian side of the falls. Most of the falls are on this side, so we can get right up close to the water, which was amazing. The views which we saw were like they were from a film set like Jurassic Park. Its hard to explain but the whole environment looked surreally plastic, like a Disneyland version of itself.

We went on a boat trip which takes you really close to the waterfalls to get absolutely soaked. You can really experience the power of the water as you get close - its like needles in your face, and the noise is deafening. Dees last words before we we got on the boat was "If we sit at the front I think the water will just spray over our heads". How wrong she was. We came out soaked to the bone. Even my pants were heavy with water, and that was just after a few seconds of getting close to the spray. The weather was the hottest yet so it didnt take too long to get dry.

Earlier that day there was a traffic jam to get into Argentina which put u behind schedule, so when we got to the campsite Mac had put up our tents for us, which Dee thought was the best Valentines present. I was happy because I didnt have to buy anything to make her happy.

Just a quick note about the majority of our overnight stays as we head down the east coast of Brazil/Argentina. Due to the immense distance we have to cover daily its mostly not possible to find towns with campsites, so when everyone if trucked out we just stop, park up the truck get the tents down from the roof and pitch right there. The first bushcamp we broke into a wood, well, pineforest actually. It was swarming with mosquitos and lots of little jumping spiders, but also lots of fireflies that glow amazingly at night. But then comes the dilemma, open fire means BBQ so good tasty grub, but can you risk eating when you know it may be 12hrs until you reach a flushing toilet? There is always the truck spade and a quiet bush, but you risk losing your dignity and possibly getting eaten alive by bugs as you squat.

It was also Ollies cook group that night so I had the rare opportunity to take photos, I´m usually not allowed as apparanetly I can´t take photos for S**T but I think you´ll find the following photos are of a much higher class of skill than Ollies.

During the day, petrol stations are quite few and far between so we just stop the truck on the main road, boys to the front and girls to the back - glad I have my she pee so I´m not pulling moonies each time - what a great invention.

So heading out of Paraty on towards Iguazu Falls, this was the hottest day to date, sweltering 34 degress on the bus. By lunchtime everyone was feeling the burn so we managed to find a little town of around 10 local houses. Cameron (the truck) did us proud by taking us down a sharp decline one lane mudtrack to find the most beautiful beach so far in Brazil. After supplying the locals with some of our sandwiches for lunch they didn´t mind our bright orange truck taking up their whole town square as we wandered down to pure emerald green sea and smooth off white sand. This beach find was quite unexpected and we were so desperate to cool off most of us just stripped to underwear and dived in. A few funny looks from locals but no comments were made! It really has reached that level of closeness between us, 22 adults sharing a space 2 x 4m for 20hr a day does that to you!

So soaking from sea water we wandered back onto the truck, a 12hr drive that day to stay on a campsite just south of Sao Paulo. When we say campsite , I use the term very loosely, they vary quite a lot but most have one or two communal toilets with cold showers and nothing else. If we come across one with heated showers and a pool it is comparable to staying in a 6 star hotel.

As we arrived in this little town the sky turned a deep grey and the mountains had soon disspeared by thick cloud and rain. The whole sky flashed white as we saw fork lightening hitting the floor around us. I kindly gave Ollie the job of erecting the tent in the rain (with metal poles - missed him though,dammit ) and I got started cooking. Each night cook groups rotate and they do breakfast and lunch also. Ours was by far the best food of the trip, potato salad with honey soy chicken and aubergine sheeps cheese bake and we filled our bellys watching the electrical storm for hours. We then spent 4 hours playing "shithead" in the pouring rain, playing cards and water = soggy, great combination!!

So off to the falls, 2 more full days driving with only a bush camp enroute to break the monotomy. Plus the fun of service station toilets (did I mention you can´t flush loo roll in south america -overflowing bins and hot weather, smells good) and beating Ollie at backgammon as my only pleasure - oh life is hard.

p.s. Did I mention argentinian vino tinto is one quid fifty, and thats the expensive stuff. I´m officially alcoholic.

p.p.s. Keep seeing shoes tied with their laces hanging from the electrical wires in small towns, apparantly this is where you go to find drug dealers at night and I naively thought it was a childs game or something. Lots to learn.

dee.x

Hi guys,

Ollies busy fiddling with his many gadgets, I´m bored sat waiting for him so thought I´d update.

Where were we? Oh yeah hung over after the gay ball, well as you guys know we missed the welcome meeting for this trip, our attendance rate got much worse when we missed the meeting meal set for that night (we did have important things to do like use the internet). Our guilt increased as we met them on the way back to the hotel all holding hands - new best buddies; ain´t it sweet. However our charm and GREAT personalities got us back on track and we also have many ´new best buddies´

So there are 22 travellers on the truck ´Cameron´with tour guides Luca and Mac (I call him big mac cos he´s massive -in the fat sense). Arrived at Paraty at teatime, an old colonial town 286km south Rio very touristy, but pretty. First night we had a group meal (sticky over cooked pasta with bacon type sauce that had no flavour - that group ain´t cooking again) we then got allocated tents. These tents are green, mouldy smelling and small and will be our home for the next 5 months. Great. To round off a lovely meal the brazilian weather didn´t let us down by giving us a great lightening show with about 6 hours of torrential rain. The capsite was a lake and our beautiful smelly tent leaked so much we went to bed under a shower of rain water. So wet clothes on, wet bags to lie beside, muddy feet and no room to even breathe, we spent our first night overlanding.

I woke up in a great mood - dirty, smelly, no sleep and nothing dry to put on.

But, the sun sensing my wrath has done nothing but shine its glorious face off of the past two days. We´ve done a group boat trip with snorkeling (tropical fish and everything) and a day on the beach and now I´ve decided its too hot. I can´t drink enough water to keep up with the sweat, and Ollie is quite embarassing with his glowing redness. What, all we Brits do is complain - never?!

So off to Igazu Falls tomorrow morning, at 9am, having packed up our smelly green home.

dee x

On thursday we got on the truck which is our home for the next 5 months. It smells a bit and theres no air conditioning and theres not enough space, but weve grown an affinity with it already. Its called Cameron and when we drive through little towns and villages, everyone in the street looks up and waves at us.

The truck is pretty comfortable but storage space is minimal. Weve all been given jobs to do - mine is unloading and loading the bag, presumably because im strong and fit. Dees job is to look after the toilet roll and cleaning products, presumably because she looks like a cleaning lady.

We only drove for 5 hours and we arrived in Paraty, which is either pissing with rain or oppressively hot. Im not sure which i prefer. I seem to spend most of my time shying from the sun like a vampire or cowering from the rain like the witch from The Wizard of Oz.

Our first night camping was during a thunderstorm and our tent leaked, which wasnt a good start to the holiday, but the next day was boiling hot so we went to the beach and walked into Paraty.

The village is very old and picturesque. There was an organised boat trip in the afternoon, which was great fun. Everyone brought their own drinks and by the afternoon everyone was merry and we stopped to do some swimming and diving off the boat. It was a good opportunity to get to know everyone on our trip, and so far everyone seems nice. Im not sure ill have the same view in 3 weeks time though.

Included in our Rio activities was a boat trip around one of the bays to see the sunset. There were a few free (strong) cocktails and within an hour people were dancing to the dodgy DJ playing songs like the Grease megamix (a wella wella wella huh). The weather was raining so we didnt see the sunset, but I dont think many people were bothered by that. This Rio Carnival trip is the end of a few weeks travelling for a lot of people, and this was their last excursion together, so everyone was up for a good time. We got back to the hotel a bit tipsy and prepared ourselves for the Gay Ball.

The Gay Ball is a televised all over Brazil and is famous for its transvestites and fancy dress. We (well, Dee) decided to put a lot of effort into the costumes we were going to wear and tried to glam it up as much as possible. I thought we were pretty camp, but when we got downstairs at our hotel we saw what some of the other guys were wearing, it put us to shame. A couple of them were wearing speedos and t-shirts with the nipples cut out. For some, it was their first night at a gay club. I dont think they knew what they were letting themselves in for.

When we arrived we had to walk down the red carpet to get in and the huge crowd cheered and wolf whistled as we went past. It certainly was an experience...